Title: 'HELPING OTHERS'

Title: 'Light Orb of SERVICE'/Mx - Visual Prayer Art by Rev.Bola A

Hebrews 13:16 

'Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, 

for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.'

Why Help Others? 

When I help others, I gain so much more in return.
When I help others, I am doubly blessed. 
First, I know I am blessed to have something to give.
Second, when I give of myself, my blessings are returned many times over.
The investment of helping someone else yields returns at a much faster rate than self-absorption.
When I help others, in turn, they also help me when I am in need. In the end, I have created a community of caring relationships. These relationships are important for the health and fulfillment of every member of my community. Communities are a symbol of humanity's reality that no man is an island. I know I cannot go though life without the help of others, and strive to help my fellow man. I am rewarded when I see the smile in another person's face because of something I have provided them. It is a great joy to be able to light up another person's eyes. I feel a sense of fulfillment and accomplishment because I can go outside myself to meet another person's needs. I share in the joy that others experience when they receive help from me. When I help others, I learn lessons in humility by considering others above myself. Helping others reminds me that it is not all about me. I learn gratitude by putting myself in the shoes of others and being thankful for what I have. Gaining a clearer sense of purpose, a heart filled with gratitude, a humble attitude, and caring relationships in return for merely helping others seems to me like an excellent trade.

Self-Reflection Questions:
 1. Who can I help today?
2. What do I have to offer?
3. When was the last time I helped someone?

Philippians 2:4 

'Let each of you look not only to his own interests, 

but also to the interests of others.'

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Title: 'The Greatness in Saying ''No'''

Title: 'JUST SAY NO' Light Orb/Mx -  Visual Prayer Art by Rev.Bola A

How and Why You Need It.

Have you ever agreed to do something you actually did not have time for, or that you genuinely simply did not wish to do? Naturally you have! We all have, for that matter. And after you agreed to the chore did you observe that it made you feel distressed, pushed for time, or resentful of the duty? Probabilities are eminent that the answer is likewise a resonating “yes.”

Understandably, it’s more comfortable to say “yes” to people, particularly when the people are those we care about. We do this because we don’t wish to let other people down, disappoint them or be accused of not being available. We also do it because saying “no” has a negative connotation in our society. It sends the message that somehow we can’t do it all, we’re not accommodative or we’re not as warm and amenable.

Of course, being there for people when they need us is a beneficial thing. The issue is that a lot of people say “yes” at the expense of their own mental and physical well being. Assume too many obligations and your well-intentioned effort to conduct your child’s school play could turn you into a walking zombie, or, worse, a bad-tempered one.

To lay it very simply, taking on too much is a surefire way to increase your stress and fatigue levels while diminishing your spare time and peace of mind. Because of this, it is necessary to learn how to say “NO.”

Saying “NO” and Meaning It

Most people do need to learn how to say “no,” because typically the natural response is to agree. Above all else, it is our unresolved emotions that cause us to agree to do things that we later regret. The Christians Victorious Spiritual life coaching program is an all important resource to help you let go of such damaging behavior patterns and unresolved emotions to harness the power of saying “no.”  Spiritual counseling is also instrumental in assisting you to let go of the guilt or feeling of obligation that often sets in when you turn someone down, and the need to play 'God' or be 'Superman or Superwoman' in other people's lives.

Our tools will enable you to take your life back and live with room for both self and others, helping others when it is appropriate and setting boundaries for yourself in a healthy and harmonious way.

Boundaries are there for good reason.

Deuteronomy 19:14

¹⁴ Do not move your neighbor’s boundary stone set up by your predecessors in the inheritance you receive in the land the Lord your God is giving you to possess.

Also, if you find yourself wavering when faced with a request you’d rather not do, remind yourself that it’s OK to say “no” with these four reassuring facts:

• Saying “no” is not selfish. Instead it releases up your time so you are able to spend more of it with friends and family.

• Saying “no” will permit you additional time and vigor to follow your aspirations or sample new hobbies.

• If you say “yes” too much, it could cause you to feel stressed out, angry, resentful or tired, which doesn’t benefit anybody.

• You’re not the only person who can do the requested task. Have faith in other people’s abilities to help you out or take your place.

If you or someone you know requires further assistance with this issue, or any others mentioned on this site, we would be happy to assist you. Simply email your enquiries to Rev.Bola:
bolaamail-recovery@yahoo.co.uk    or      bolamail-church@yahoo.co.uk

Please allow up to 7 days for a lengthy, detailed answers.

Peace and Light Rev.Bola 
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Title: 'Why Have Pastoral Counseling?'

 

Title: 'PASTORAL COUNSELING'/Mx - Visual Prayer Art from Collection by Rev.Bola

Jeremiah 3:15

¹⁵ “‘And I will give you shepherds after my own heart, who will feed you with knowledge and understanding.

*PASTOR - (Definition)

noun
1. A Christian minister or priest having Spiritual charge over a congregation, fellowship, ministry, or other group.
2. A lay person having spiritual charge over a person or group.
3. A shepherd.
Similar meanings of *Pastor*

rector, vicar, shepherd,  dean, canon,  abbot, prior, abbé; chaplain; minister, priest, reverend, father, parson, divine, ecclesiastic, churchman, clergyman, cleric, prebendary, capitular;

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*Counsel*  - definition:

1. The act of exchanging opinions and ideas; consultation.
2. Advice or guidance, especially as solicited from a knowledgeable person.
3. A plan of action.
4. Private, guarded thoughts or opinions: for example - keeping one's own counsel.

 Noun  
1.   advice, instruction, guidance, direction, teaching; opinion, suggestion, recommendation; warning, admonition.

2.   consultation, deliberation, dialogue, discussion, consideration, conference; examination, study, analysis, advisement.

3.   plan, design, deliberate purpose.

verb
 a) To give or take advice. b) To give counsel to. 
 c) To recommend.

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*SPIRITUAL COUNSELING*

Q1. What is Spiritual Counseling?

Definition of: *Spiritual*

adjective

1. Of, pertaining to, or consisting of spirit; incorporeal.

2. Of, or pertaining to the spirit or soul, as distinguished from the physical nature: a spiritual approach to life.

3. Characterized by or suggesting predominance of the spirit; ethereal or delicately refined.

4. Of or pertaining to the spirit as the seat of the moral or religious nature.

5. Of or pertaining to sacred things or matters; religious; devotional; sacred.

6. Of or belonging to the church; ecclesiastical:  the sphere of religious, spiritual, or ecclesiastical matters, or such matters in themselves. 

 

Similar meanings of *Spiritual*

 devotional, discarnate, disembodied, divine, ethereal, holy, immaterial, sacred, pure, incorporeal, nonphysical, ghostly, angelic, non-tangible, supernatural, eternal, hallowed, sublime, unearthly, heavenly, rapturous, supreme, causal, exalted, glorious, immaculate, eternal, consecrated.

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*Counseling* - definition
1. advice,  instruction, guidance, direction, teaching; opinion, suggestion, recommendation; warning, admonition.

2. consultation, deliberation, dialogue, discussion, consideration, conference; examination, study, analysis, advisement.

3. plan, design, deliberate purpose.

4. advise, guidance, instruction, direction; suggestion, recommendation, offering an opinion.

Tell what to do; urging, exhorting, persuading, encouraging; warning, cautioning, admonishing.

noun
1. The act of exchanging opinions and ideas; consultation.
2. Advice or guidance, especially as solicited from a knowledgeable person. 

verb   
  guide, instruct, direct; suggest, recommend, offer an opinion, tell  what to do; urge, exhort, persuade, encourage; warn, caution, admonish.
1. To give counseling
2. To recommend.
3. To give or take advice.
  
Similar meanings

consult, brief, coach, clue in, confer, direct, discuss, edify, educate, elucidate, encourage, encouragement, enlighten, enlightening, give (one's) opinion, give (one) pointers, guidance, guide, help to understand, impart (one's) wisdom, instruct, instruction, lecture, mentor, mentoring, offer recommendations, offer suggestions, oversee, piece of advice, point out, prepare, put (one's) two cents worth in, recommend, recommendation, show (one) the ropes, show (one) the way, share ones thoughts, shepherd, share (one's) insight, share (one's) experience, steer, suggest, speak to bring to (one's) senses, briefing, caution, mentoring, preparing, suggestion, enlightening, training, tutoring.

Spiritual + Counseling = Enlightened guidance, wise instruction, supernatural direction, divine solutions.


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Q2. Why is {Spiritual/Pastoral} Counseling useful, or even necessary?

Acts 1:8 
But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”

Pastoral counseling is a branch of counseling in which trained and gifted ministers, priests, spiritual mentors, guides and other persons provide therapeutic, healing or recovery services.

Pastoral counselors can often integrate traditional Spiritual training with modern psychological thoughts and methods, in an effort to address mental and spiritual issues, in addition to the traditional spectrum of counseling services. Pastoral Counseling acknowledges that the Divine Spirit can and does work through the Spiritual (Soul), Mental (Mind), Emotional (Feelings) and Material (Physical Body) aspects of the individual to provide healing and recovery.
 
Pastoral Counseling recognizes that a human-being is a complex entity of soul, mind, emotions and physical body, each one inter-linked with the other, each part affecting the other.

Q3.What are the benefits of {Spiritual/Pastoral} Counseling?

Ephesians 4:11a 

And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, 

A) What distinguishes pastoral counseling from other forms of counseling and psychotherapy, is the role and accountability of the counselor and his or her understanding and expression of the pastoral relationship.

B) Pastoral counselors are representatives of:
 the Spiritual dimension of life and its meaning, affirmed by the word of God, and exercised through His Spiritual communities. 

c) Christian Pastoral counselors base their work on the Holy Bible, honoring Christian principles, by the power and anointing of The Holy Spirit, based on the atonement for sin that was Christ's sacrifice at the Cross of Calvary. The Bible states in:-

John 14:26

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you.

Thus pastoral counseling acknowledges the Holy Spirit as the chief counselor, thereby offering a relationship to the understanding of life, through faith in the Creator of life, God, and in Jesus Christ His son.

Q4. Who benefits from {Spiritual/Pastoral} Counseling?

C) Pastoral counseling uses both theological and psychological resources to deepen its understanding of the pastoral relationship.

D) Membership in several organizations that combine theology and mental health have grown in recent years.

E) Some pastoral counselors have developed special training programs to encourage cooperation between religious professionals and medical professionals on treatment of issues like addiction, since spirituality is an important and essential part of recovery for most people.


F) Thus any seeker of truth, with a willingness to grow,  improve in, or  better understand any area of their life may benefit. This includes the full range of life issues from the apparently mundane questions, to the deeply serious challenges of every day living.

Pastoral counseling - Today

1. It had its beginnings as a separate discipline in North America in the first half of the twentieth century.

2. Various psychiatry, psychology and social work organizations began to incorporate the insights and training of theology and spiritual discipline and application into the training oftheir professionals

3. In time training programs for counseling professionals began to include Seminary training and other clerical and pastoral education as part of their collective training.

4. Also in the 1930s, the minister Norman Vincent Peale and the psychiatrist, Dr. Smiley Blanton, collaborated to form the American Foundation of Religion and Psychiatry, now known as the Blanton-Peale Institute.

5. Today, hundreds of mental health centers with links to specific spiritual traditions may be found across North America.

6. In 1963, the American Association of Pastoral Counselors was founded to provide professional certification for pastoral counselors and pastoral counseling centers.


Q5. When is {Spiritual/Pastoral} Counseling required?

Pastoral Counseling is indeed an honorable, and valuable vocation.

For instance, when we have legal disputes or problems, we would seek professional assistance from a lawyer or solicitor.
When we have physical health problems we seek our doctor or GP.
When we have dental problems, we seek out a dentist.
In the same manner, when we have emotional, or Spiritual problems, we a seek out a private Counselor or Church minister.
There are some issues that can only be fully resolved at the Spiritual level, such as addiction or demonic oppression.

Pastoral Counseling acknowledges this fact, and as mentioned earlier does recognize the complex nature of the human-being as having a soul, a mind, emotions and physical body. Thereby requiring a unified and wholistic approach to health and recovery, that must validate and acknowledge these different dimensions of the person.

Q6. How is {Spiritual/Pastoral} Counseling practiced?
 
It has been acknowledged that nearly all maladies have their roots at the Spiritual level.
 
Pastoral Counseling addresses primarily the Spiritual needs of a client, and from that spiritual level, healing begins to affect the mental, emotional and physical bodies also.

For instance it is well documented that habitual stress, can lead to
physical illness. So in addressing the root cause of the stress by pastoral counseling, one also can receive the benefit of physical health.

Pastoral Counseling is complimentary, to the other forms of treatment that the client may be undergoing, and seeks to magnify them, not undermine them. 
Experienced pastoral counselors are able to understand and work in tandem with mental health and physical health practitioners that are caring for the individual.

Conclusion

  An attempt has been made in this post, to give you a clear description, and understanding, of the purpose and need for Spiritual/Pastoral Counseling, and why it is necessary.

It is essential to realise, that no one needs to continue in suffering, when there are tools and resources available to deliver them from such. 

God loves each and every human-being, and through Jesus Christ, and what was achieved by His death at the Cross of Calvary, and then His subsequent resurrection, He has provided us with all the appropriate spiritual recovery program we need to live victoriously, both now and in the afterlife.

We at The *Christians Victorious Fellowship*, have a mandate to provide a Scripture based Christian program of resources and tools that actually work. 

If you would like further information on how to avail yourself of these resources, or to join our growing fellowship, we would love to hear from you. 
*Membership is currently free of charge, though that may change in the near future, so don't delay.

 Just email your questions and inquiries to Rev.Bola: 
bolaamail-church@yahoo.co.uk.

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Peace and Love
Rev. Bola
(Director - Christians Victorious Fellowship - Int)